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Making Love With Our Eyes

by Carlos Cortez

214 pages; quality trade paperback (softcover); catalogue #02-0791; ISBN 1-55395-077-1; US$20.50, C$26.95, EUR17.60, £12.20

"Making Love with Our Eyes," written as a personal study guide, shares a practical application of how to find the "love of one's life." Described in a refreshing and forthright manner, the contents of the book are interwoven with humor, personal observations, and the "real life" experiences of the author himself.

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about the book      about the author      Table of Contents and excerpts      catalogue info

About the Book     In the search for romance, meeting the "love of one's life" appears to many as a formidable, if not nearly impossible dream. "Making Love with Our Eyes" is about love and the quest for love. It is also about hope. Everyone hopes to find their destiny, their "special love," during life's journey. Will they? That's one of the questions that prompted the author to write a book based upon his own quest for the "love of his life." As the author states in his book: "Real success in finding love is based more on what we fail to see or understand that what might seem to be the obvious." In this book, the author details a course of action by which anyone can be ready when the enchantment of love enters into their life. This is one of the main purposes of this study guide; finding that "special kind of love." We are all deserving of love. It can also be said than an extraordinary love awaits us all. All we need to be: is ready. Those fortunate ones that have already found their one true love, will read these pages as an affirmation of all they know to be true. For those still searching, this book is especially for you.     Much more than just another how-to book, this study contains chapters specifically for dealing with how one may prepare for their own quest for love. How to go about being at the right place at the right time, while becoming the best "me" that one can become is described in a poignant, at times humorous, always refreshing style. Learning how to avoid "kissing toads" and other pitfalls in the game of love are clearly described. No challenge is presented without providing a means of achieving success. Included are note pages, an idea suggested by the author's wife. Every reader shall come to appreciate that value that this personlization affords.     "Making Love with Our Eyes" portrays the search for love and the realization of one's dreams come true in a manner that leaves no one left in the dark. Throughout, the author shares his very personal experiences, both positive and negative, that culminated in his own successful quest for his one true love. This book is a must for all those who seek to love and be loved.

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About the Author     Carlos Cortez, the son of a Colombian immigrant and a Puerto Rican mother, was born in New York City. At the age of one, his family moved to Alexandria, VA, and subsequently to W. Palm Beach Fla. His father, the son of an Argentinian military captain, moved to Colombia, S.A. after the family suffered the misfortune of being on the losing side of the revolution. His mother's family descended from nobility in northern Spain, settled in Puerto Rico.     After years of struggling with his own demons, Carlos began his own journey of recovery in the late 60's. This became a turning point in his life. Getting his life back, as he says, he began to employ those writing skills that had been dormant for many years. In addition, he commenced to develop his skills as a public speaker and seminar lecturer. For someone who had skipped class rather than face giving a book report, this was a rare accomplishment.     During his life, "truly" falling in love seemed to be what eluded him the most. Regardless of circumstances, that occurrence never seemed to become a reality. Uncertain if true love could happen, or if he were even capable of experiencing it, he sought a divorce from his wife in the mid 80's. Deciding to risk all rather than to never know for sure he began a quest for the "love of his life." As he stated, he wasn't sure if she could be found, or if she existed at all. It was during this period that the seeds for "Making Love with Our Eyes" were planted.     In 1986, Carlos married the "love of his life." His quest had been successful beyond his wildest dreams. his experience, his keen insights into human nature based upon years of "people watching," the profound awareness developed through mentors and by traditional twelve step practices, as well as his background as a lecturer and speaker became the fertile ground that brought forth this study guide.     Carlos and his wife, Beverly reside in Florida. Together they have five children and thirteen grandchildren. He says, "Regardless of external circumstances, we have always maintained a deep and abiding love for each other, a love that supersedes all considerations. What we found has always remained with us, only more so with each season of life and love."

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Table of Contents and excerpts

Table of Contents

Page 1 .................... Prologue

Page 7 .................... Ahh Love!

Page 17 .................. The Princess and the Knight

Page 27 .................. Falling in Love or Falling in Heat

Page 37 .................. To Love and be Loved

Page 47 .................. Do I Have Any Clue?

Page 59 .................. Doing Our Homework

Page 83 .................. More Homework

Page 101 ................ Courtship 101

Page 113 ................ Courtship 102

Page 125 ................ Some Obstacles Along the Way

Page 141 ................ I'm Already Involved. What Now?

Page 157 ................ Already Involved, part two

Page 171 ................ My Own Personal Quest, part one

Page 185 ................ Personal Quest Fulfilled, part two

Page 195 ................ In Closing, It Is Only the Beginning

Excerpts

Making love with our eyes!
I wonder how many of us are aware of this mysterious ability that our eyes seem to possess?

Everyone loves a good love story. That's why cinema and books about romance have always been so popular. .....We hope that "falling in love" will happen to us.

Love, that mysterious emotion as vital to our spiritual and emotional well-being as nourishment is to one's physical body, appears to many of us as an elusive wraith whose whereabouts lie just beyond our reach.

With family and friends in the role of their intended (or unintended) accomplices, we may be eventually worn down by our persevering pals, "Hang On Mary" or "Old Faithful George."

"Love, the love of which most everyone's dreams are created; the love that most everyone hopes to find, never ever settles for less."

This does not imply that only "Fair Princess's" try their hand at a little image molding. "Knights" also have ideas about how their "Fair Princess" and things in general should really be.

A major complaint of many women is that their partners don't listen to what they are saying. It is a predominant cause of smoldering resentments among women.

"The discoveries about who I really am, based upon the actions that I have taken (those described herein) were more than worth the effort and emotional self-searching involved. ....."It changed my life!"

How had my "affaire d'amour" portfolio been doing on the ups and (mostly) downs of the "roller coaster of love?"

In this chapter, each topic is accompanied by various questions we shall want to ask ourselves.

Family values: .....Are her (his) or my children well-mannered, or is an hour with them more like a quick tour of Hell?

Lifestyles: .....Would we be the Odd Couple?

Compatibility: .....Does she (he) have a pleasant voice, or laugh like a crazed hyena?

Appearance: .....Not to appear shallow, but is physical appearance a significant factor?

Pets: .....Maybe, it's a 16' python named "Snuggles."

The rule of thumb here is: "The more intimate the relationship, the less objectivity there shall be."

It's an odd phenomenon of life, like some weird natural law. It goes something like this: "If no visible opportunities exist, none will readily appear."

Whether one believes it or not, somewhere in the dark recesses of our brain, our mind has announced to us, "Don't worry. You will find your love by next Christmas!"

Remember: "Happiness is always an inside job."

Visualizing life from another gender's point of view can be incredibly enlightening.

Love is not about winning. Love is about giving and receiving, and compromise.

The evening that I first met the "love of my life" was not much different than most other nights. What I recalled most profoundly were her eyes, her (I know now very nervous) smile, and her tiny hands and feet.

What I didn't know was, that independently of me, she had been making an inventory of her own. .....So, as I was cautiously scrutinizing her, it appears she too was scrutinizing me.

Our lips met, discovering the swollen delicacy of impassioned tenderness, suddenly aroused. ....."We kissed!"

This, is the love of the poets and muses!

True love can never be hurried. .....When one least expects it, that "special person" shall appear.

I know beyond question that genuine "true love" is forever. Even with the passage of time, shall all the seasons of love endure until the end of eternity.

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Catalogue Information

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