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Grief Is A Shadow: A Biography of My Love

by Albert M. Swash

229 pages; quality trade paperback (softcover); catalogue #00-0156; ISBN 1-55212-491-6; US$21.00, C$25.00, EUR17.50, £12.50

This biography is a journey through 52 years of successful marriage which ended under tragic circumstances. The reader is confronted in the final chapter with the decision faced by the author. WAS negligence involved with the demise of his wife?

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about the book      about the author      sample excerpts      catalogue info

About the Book This biographical story is a journey through the 52 years of a successful marriage which ended under tragic circumstances. The reader will be confronted in the final chapter with the decision faced by the Author - WAS negligence involved with the demise of his wife? You will be invited to interact with the writer by sharing by email your thoughts. The story is filled with the humor and pathos of an ordinary couple, who battled the heights of love and the valleys of tribulations, to succeed where many would have failed. It is written in an easy and flowing style, allowing the reader to enjoy the story without the baffle of long and confusing words. One reviewer reported that she sat in the well of her yacht and alternately laughed and cried. The trials and tribulations of his early life in the Canadian Army will give you laughs, and then leaves you enthusiastic as he outlines his revenge on his sadistic antagonists. Travel with this interesting couple in their many journeys together, both in North America and Europe. Another reviewer said "A true love story". Grief is a Shadow is not a dialogue of despair, but rather an antidote for living.

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About the Author Albert Swash was born on February 17, 1922. He graduted from Moulsham Street Elementary School in Chelmsford, Essex, at age 14. After volunteering for the Royal Marines in 1940, he served in North Africa. He met and married Iris in Norwich, Norfolk in 1947, and they emigrated to Canada in 1954. He joined the Royal Canadian Corps of Signals in Kingston, Ontario in 1954, and served with the United Nations Expeditionary Force in the Gaza Strip in 1957. He was discharged in 1972. After employment as a Communications Supervisor in the Halifax Dockyards from 1972 to 1984, he moved to British Columbia, living in Cobble Hill and Ladysmith on Vancouver Island before settling in Chilliwack, outside of Vancouver. Visit Albert's website at www.members.tripod.com/alberto.ms

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Sample Excerpts

Chapter 6
The Parting and the Promotion

     As we clung together on Halifax Station to say our farewells, I noticed a misting in her eyes, a tremor in her voice and a trembling in her body, I had to keep saying to myself "Grown men don't cry," it was a lasting memory, as poignant to me now as it was so long ago. The military rules were, that we would not be together again until I received my first posting in nine months, it was almost like receiving a sentence. The loud hailer called out "All those recruits going to Montreal gather at the loading gate" I took my last kiss, and proceeded to take the next step in my life.
     I joined in the rabble - they could be called little less - gathering at the gate, all of them, except me, were pink cheeked, the bum fluff still evident on their boyish features. Along came this cocky little Officer who had inherited his first "Pip" (2Lt) the previous day, and unknowingly, us on the second.
     He managed to get us lined up, looked us over - I had nicknamed him in my mind as "Field Marshall Montgomery", he was that pompous. "Swash" he called, "Here sir" I replied, "Get out here." He addressed the squad, for want of a better name,"this is Swash" he went on "He is my representative, and I will tell him what I want, and you will do what he says." How about that! Promoted and I wasn't even in uniform yet.
     The trip was a nightmare, those kids, wild eyed and let out of the cage for the first time would have destroyed everything they came in contact with, if they had been left to run free. I was not allowed time to reflect on my recent parting, my time was completely taken up getting them out of one scrape after another, while Monty enjoyed the peace and quiet of his Sleeper Car. My biggest embarrassment came on the railway station platform at Rimouski, in Northern Quebec. My pretentious officer had informed me that we would be stopping here for forty minutes. I want you to march them up and down the platform for twenty-five minutes.
     After managing to get all 18 of them out onto the platform, I formed them up in three rows. The use of the proper order "ranks", would only have added more confusion. What now, I asked myself. This crew had received no military training, consequently they knew no orders for marching or stopping. I stood there facing a quandary. To the crowded patrons of Canadian National gathered waiting for the train's departure we must have looked like a segment out of the Sgt. Bilko Sitcom. I found myself replacing Left Turn with Turn that way, Quick march with Start Walking, and Halt with Stop, it was a riot, but one I wanted to forget.
     Eventually we arrived in Montreal where I gave up my baby-sitting duties, changed trains and proceeded to Kingston, Ontario. The future Field Marshall --- in his eyes at least, did tell me I had done a good job and he would make sure that my Commanding Officer would be informed of my potential. Knowing how much influence that would carry in my coming environment, I did not attempt to pin my stripes on right away. You will find out in the next chapter his reference of my ability did not precede me to Vimy barracks.
     Leaving Montreal for Kingston gave me time for more thought of my dear wife and just how much she meant to me. I missed her by my side, and I could not help wondering if she would have been proud of me in my recent tribulation. I just know she would not have laughed as so many did, she was too understanding for that.

Addendum: There has been quite a period of time since I last worked on this project, a time when my thoughts were still in the past, and are still causing me pangs of remorse and tears of remembrance, however there are now some times I feel guilty at being able to enjoy the company of others. One of these acquaintances, Mary, my counselor has read my written thoughts so far, and encouraged me to continue with this biography, I thank her for her inspiration. She joins two others who feel I should also continue.

Chapter 2
Black Monday

     The room felt small and confining, the walls threatening, we had been asked to leave room 209, a number to be forever engraved on my mind. The recalcitrant nurse had at last conceived the condition of my wife, she had finally visited the room, almost four hours after being informed her patient was complaining of lack of oxygen. How could this be?
     Within ten minutes a "Code Blue" had been issued and a team of doctors and nurses had descended, albeit probably too late. I sat numbly on a chair, I could not believe my life was, at this moment, facing the possibility of my being "Alone in the world". My ignorance of the importance of oxygen would live with me forever.
      My friends sat across the small room from me, the fear of the outcome so obvious by the look on their faces. We had pleaded for some attention from the nursing staff, only to be turned away, it appeared, "as meddling relatives". The sight of the oxygen meter with its low reading had forewarned us of the impending panic.
      Our marriage had not been blessed with wealth, health is more important and we had been fortunate to enjoy that until now. We had traveled the world, climbed the mountains of love and good times, descended the valleys of trials and tribulations, and survived the pitfalls that can wreck some marriages. Progeny had escaped us. Missing at this time for me was the arm of a loving son or daughter around my shoulders to say, "Everything will be all right Dad".
      I had been truly blessed with the love of a wonderful woman, enjoyed the companionship of a truly caring person. The future, like the room, was cold and uninviting.
      I heard footsteps coming down the hall, a nurse entered, looked across at me and said, "Your wife would like to see you". My friend took my hand, I could feel the love and understanding in her grasp as we made our fearful way back to the room of impending destiny.
      My life flashed in front of me.....

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Catalogue Information

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