Swimming with Sharks in Dark Water

This book has been written to help you maneuver the world of corporate America, specifically white corporate America. This is an environment run by rules that are not written on paper, but shared through a common culture, the culture of white men. I can remember being in graduate school reading the seminal literature on business, and every single example of the great thinkers were white men. How is it possible through all the brilliance in the world, the great thoughts and inventions done by so many of color, that an entire discipline of thought is limited to one race and one gender? This book is designed to help you through the difficulties, to give you tips on how to walk around and survive the elements of corporate America that are meant to trip you up. This book is will give you guidance on how to become a successful leader in this (white corporate) culture without selling out who you are in race and gender. It is designed to help you embrace who you are in a world that may not embrace the things you absolutely love about yourself. Think of this as a survival guide, and much more. Think of this book as your guidebook to the place you wish to be in a land that was never designed to consider you king. Yes, I meant king! If you respond by saying “I do not have the skill set”, and “I am not good enough”, let me take the time to set you straight. Many years ago, my younger brother wanted to be a doctor. He had just graduated from undergrad studies but had not mailed any of the applications to medical school. I asked him why? He looked at me and said, “I do not think I am smart enough.” You see for many years when he went to school, several white teachers had discouraged him from going to college. They had never told him that he was brilliant, special, and should follow his passion. Instead, they questioned his drive, and advised a secondary path, a path that supported the white level of comfort. I knew this, and I responded, “why not, I know a lot of dumb doctors.” He laughed and mailed his applications. He received full fellowships to several schools. I tell you this story to say that anyone with the drive, heart, focus, and tenacity can be a success in corporate America. All the things that make you unique can make you successful. You were probably not told this enough, if you were told at all. You may think that it is not the responsibility of the education system to tell us we are brilliant or capable of achieving our dreams. Perhaps, or perhaps not; but I will tell you as a person of color, the chances of you hearing that you are capable of anything, is far less. When I was in graduate school, I was sitting in class taking a course from one of the premier thinkers of the topic. Next to me was a white woman. In the middle of the lecture, she raised her hand and stated that she did not understand a single thing he was discussing or writing on the black board. She said this in front of the entire class. The professor stopped, turned around, and said, “Don’t worry, you will.” Do you understand that type of validation this woman received? In one second, she was allowed to be comfortable in a state of “unknowing.” If I had raised my hand and made the statement, my entire existence in the program would have been questioned. What I am saying in this example, is that brilliance is not required for success in corporate America. Being perfect is not required, and it is even permissible to be dumb and lost at times in corporate America, and still succeed. We, as people of color, believe (as we should) that skills, intellect, commitment, and focus should be enough. But it is not, you need to understand that because you are of color, you need a unique set of skills to succeed. The purpose of this book is to help you become successful in corporate America by having you understand that being of color is a characteristic that defines you. Even though you do not define it as a determinate of your value, others do. The reality of that statement appears almost contrary to the wonderful politically correct language that we hear every day in the office. Use this book as a survival guide to help you respond to those slights that are thrown at us every day simply because of the color of our skin. This book is designed to give you the information that I have acquired over the years. I am going to share with you how to swim with sharks in dark waters. This book is going to give you a set of rules, based on the situation that you may find yourself. These are rules that I have developed over the years and shared on a regular basis with friends of color, particularly women. The mistake they make (regularly) is to change their mind when applying the rule. They will usually say, “Oh, he is not that bad, do I really have to ignore him?” The problem is that as women, particularly women of color we are taught to be nice. Heck, we have to be nice. When nice does not work we become mad. What we have not been taught is that there is a very comfortable productive state between nice and mad. You do not have to be my mother, but you do have to properly react to racist incidents in the office. You need to develop professional skills in combating racism. For lack of a better term let’s call this Skills for Swimming with Sharks (SSS).