The Journey of Life- To My Dog, Horse, and My Parents
by
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42. Mourning on the Prairie
I was in high spirits after getting up because it was the last day for me to patrol around the watermelon field. It was a sunny morning, everything enjoyed the lovely weather, the soft breeze rippled the surface of the clear river, the birds chirped among the flourishing branches in the tree, showing off their delicate voice. Some butterflies flapped their beautiful wings, flying among the wild flowers gracefully, sucking the sweet pollen greedily. The fragrance from the mature corn spread in the air, claiming that the harvest time was coming. I was fully intoxicated by the harmonious atmosphere what the nature had offered.
My horse still couldn’t stand up, I must help her to do some exercises, otherwise her muscles would shrink and unable to walk any more. Thinking of this I pushed her and tried all my efforts to sustain her body. Cooperating with me, she struggled to rise to her feet, wobbled for a while but eventually stood straight up. Clapping for her courage, I guided her move ahead slowly. Hauling her bony body with weak legs, she stepped forward in great difficultly. Only walking a few meters, Wangwang was already exhausted. Realizing she had run out of energy, I stopped forcing her to go on walking. Holding her arms I helped her sit down little by little, she lay down safely under my support. After getting my horse settled, I went to cut grass for her, to my disappointment, she didn’t eat at all. In tears I went to carry water, to my relief, she drank a little. I massaged her back and kissed her forehead, tears dripping down and falling into one of her eyes.
I soothed her by rubbing her head gently, telling her not to cry any more. Her best friend Huahua sat by her side, licking her nose with great care. It was the most precious love from a sincere friend, which endowed her with power and desire to live: she put her mouth into the bucket and drank a lot. I was so pleased to see this, carrying the bucket I rushed to the river and came back quickly with more water. Touching her back softly, I told her I would go to watch the melon field with Huahua. The bright sunlight stroked her body, comforting our aching hearts. Though I did not want to leave her alone on the prairie, I had to work on my assignment. Before leaving I said to my poor horse, “Hold on Wangwang, I will come back as early as possible.”
The horse lay there very quietly as if she understood my words. Leaving the poor horse reluctantly, I made it to the watermelon field. Soon we arrived at there, as what I wished I didn’t see any intruder. Crossing the crop field I examined the melons carefully. I breathed a sigh of relief after seeing everything was in good condition. Strolling around I sang songs to celebrate the upcoming victory. A white butterfly with beautiful wings suddenly perched on my arm, which attracted me so much that I subconsciously stopped walking. It fled quickly when I was trying to catch it. I didn’t give up but went on searching, soon a new object I found: it was a bigger one flying elegantly above the watermelon land. Moving slowly towards it, I got closer and closer to the graceful princess, suddenly a feral bull came to my sight when I almost reached the butterfly. I became aware that a powerful rival I would confront.
If I didn’t stop the bull, it would cross the watermelon filed and made its way to the neighboring crops. I had learned a bitter lesson from the previous experience, so I gestured my dog not to chase it. Huahua kept silent as I wished, but she kept her eyes on the bull alertly and ready to react to any situation. I stood in front of the bull, swaying a stick, warning it to leave. The bull stared at me with hostile eyes for a short while, and then suddenly rushed at me with two sharp horns targeting my legs. I ran desperately towards my small hut while my dog Huahua stopped the bull. I dared not look back as I felt the bull was chasing me behind. It seemed that the whole air was frozen, what I heard was only the mournful voice of my dog. My legs began to tremble so violently that I couldn’t run any further, surrounded by dreadful fear I fell down on the prairie near my hut.
Something unexpected must have happened since my dog stopped barking. I totally fell into despair when I saw the fierce bull stampeding towards me. At that moment I closed my eyes, waiting to yield to a fatal attack, as if I had felt the mad bull was lifting me up with its sharp horns, threw me into the dampened pit. To my surprise, my horse suddenly stood up, kicking the fierce bull with all her strength. Making a miserable sound, the bull ran away. My horse Wangwang exhausted all her strength and energy, with the last kick she pulled me out of death, while she collapsed, lying breathlessly on the beautiful prairie, closed her eyes forever. She was unable to feel my touch and my kiss any more though I tried to wake her up. Wiping tears with shivering fingers, I went to look for my dog Huahua.
That was an unforgettable tragic scene: My dog Huahua was lying at the edge of the watermelon field, her head and legs soaked with blood, the skin on her back had been torn off, but her eyes were still half open, as if she was searching where I was. She didn’t give any response to me no matter how desperately I cried. In terrible grief I carried her back home. Now my two friends were still with me, but they couldn’t see my bitter tears any more. Those beautiful days we spent together reflected in my mind, vividly frame by frame, like in a film. I thought of how I begged daddy to buy Wangwang and how I spent those happy time on her back; how Wangwang protected me from the heavy storm; how Huahua took a risk to steal corn for me; how Huahua pulled me out of the river when I almost drowned; how they comforted me when I cried…but now they were gone, leaving me alone on the wide prairie, lonely and helpless.
It seemed that the time had stopped and the air around me frozen, everything began to weep, mourned them in their special way. It was a night full of tragic tears, I still held the paws of my Huahua, and as usual I put feet between the legs of my Wangwang, they were still there accompanying me, but I couldn’t hear their heartbeats any more. I eventually finished my task, the next day those farmers would come to reap the crops, but my two loyal friends had no chance to enjoy it. I was completely alone at this moment, the cat ran away, the frogs left, the chickens were taken home by daddy, the small fish were eaten by the duck, my dog and horse were still here, but they couldn’t warm me any more.
The next morning daddy came. When he decided to carry Huahua and Wangwang away, I knelt down, cried desperately to beg him not to do that. Daddy was touched after knowing how they saved my life. I pointed at the dam and told daddy to bury them there. Dad dug a big pit beneath a plum tree near the dam, and according to my wish he built a tomb for my two friends. I burst into tears when dad put them into the pit and covered their body with fresh soil. I made two wreaths with branches of the tree after daddy left. Lying on the tomb, touching the soil, I began to talk with my dog and horse, “Huahua and Wangwang, we are still together, you are under the ground and I am above it, but we still live on the same earth.”
I didn’t know how to spend the rest tough days without their care and protection. Maybe tomorrow would be another day!
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About the Book
This book told a true story happened in a piece of grassland in the northern part of China in 1980th. On a peaceful prairie lived a special family: a little child, five years old she was. The dad “abandoned” her there with a well-trained dog and a tame blind horse. Since the dad disappeared for unknown reasons, they consciously played mothers to the girl. They drove the wicked strangers away and protected her from being injured by those savage animals. When the food given by those passersby were eaten up, the smart dog took a risk to steal corn cobs for the starving child. In order to appease hunger, she began to eat the grass like the dog. As a five year child, in order to get a job for food, she began to take care of the crops field for the farmers, unluckily, a wild horse kicked on her head when she attempted to stop it from invading the farming land. The threat of death was gone when her two close friends came: the brave dog and the loyal horse fought against the strong enemy until it ran away. They sacrificed in the fierce war for protecting her.
Losing mothers-the dog and the horse, the girl suffered from the first tragedy in her life. Daddy later came back to her, and meanwhile he took a lady to that grassland and since then they lived together. The girl dreamed that the happy life would came, but it turned out that she was wrong. She found the secret in her parents: Dad was handicapped and full of scars in his whole body and mother was a mad woman, who tried all her best to hurt dad. As a little child, she couldn’t escape from those terrible nights: mom pulled her hair, bit her toes, put a knife under her quilt, caused blood spilling…dad paralyzed and spit a lot of blood, who began to wander between heaven and hell.
About the Author
Whenever an infant descends on this magic world, the tiny creature will be cuddled by its parents. The little fragile life should have been taken good care no matter how deformed it looks, but in the real life not all infants are that much lucky, as one of them, I was born to this world, and subconsciously sorted out myself from the others in the sense that I attached to animals more than human beings.
My mother became mentally ill three months after I was born, which happened in the winter in 1976, snowing in the northern part of China. As a result of psychosis, mom was dreadfully afraid of the newly born baby-me. She pushed me away and dragged me from one side to another on the dusty ground. I repeatedly tried to get close to her as I was too hungry to refuse. My poor dad, a handicapped man had been suffering from stomachache and hemorrhage, struggling to survive and therefore lost power to make a good living.
My tiny toes were very attractive to mom since she had formed a habit of biting them. In many dead silent nights, mom sneaked up to me, uncovered the thin quilt, pulled my hair and began to enjoy biting my toes. I screamed and awakened dad, who bailed me out of hot water. When old enough to eat and walk by myself, daddy took me to a piece of grassland, left me there alone with a dog and a horse. Under some nice passersby’s care, I lived through and spent my childhood in that holy and magic land. You would know how I survived and what beautiful stories happened in that mysterious prairie if you were interested in my book.
One day when I played around a river, a stout man turned up and led me to a primary school. Being poor and having no protection, some boys bullied me and the others separated me from them. I had no complaint about that as I was clear they were afraid of mother. What had been following me are those nice friends from nature, the bugs, crickets, frogs… who liked to accompany me no matter what happened. I love them as they treat me as equally as the other kids and there is no discrimination in their eyes.
Mom’s condition got worse and worse, who never had a desire to talk with me no matter how I was eager to arouse her love for a child; and dad finally got paralyzed and was carried onto an ambulance. I was lived alone once again, but I got my life prolonged and tried to live through. I prayed faithfully for dad and mum on my way to beg. I got food as alms and shared it with mother. When dad came back from hospital, I had graduated from middle school and luckily was admitted by a senior school in a small city.
I long for staying at school campus, as in China, it is the only way to change fate. Being moved by my tears of passion, daddy sold a piece of land, which he ploughed long time ago and saw me off on my new trip. I treasured the chance so much that I had been hanging there, and never gave up. During those hard days, I didn’t ask more money from dad, as I knew he had been at stake and was possibly dying. I went hunger and cold, and finally got sick. When being ready to leave this world, daddy sold the fish pond, which we depended on for a living, and took me to hospital. He gave all hope to me and swore that he would wait for me at home.
In hospital I was afflicted with high fever, but recovered three months later just before the entrance examination started. I was luckily allowed to take part in the examination and admitted by a college one month later. When I ran back home to tell the exciting news to daddy, only to find my small house was burned by a fire; both dad and mom were gone… I was told daddy died in hospital and mom set fire on our house, and nobody found where she was…
Losing everything, I returned to that small city, strolled around the noisy street, too hungry and week to feel sad. A warmhearted lady led me to a restaurant, where I worked for a cruel boss day and night in exchange for a bed and a bowl of rice. I thought of dad and mum, too painful to have any appetite. Under heavy work and mistreatment, I got sick again. A nice waitress assisted me in living through the hard life. In those tough days, a lady whom I never met in real life offered me a hand and paid the tuition for me in the college. I left that terrible boss of the restaurant and started another hard trip.
I worked hard and picked up a few part-time jobs, heavy pressure added up to a vulnerable body and finally pushed me to the rim of death once again. I kept coughing violently, even unable to breathe, a lot of blood spilled out of my mouth and nose. I became aware that I would follow dad and go to heaven soon. I attached to this world so much that I struggled to get myself come to. With the help of school teachers and the doctors, I beat the evil ghost and finally won. When leaving the hospital behind, I came to realize I owed so much to those kind people who bailed me out that I must get my life prolonged, so that I could pay them back someday.
I graduated from the college and found a teaching job in a private school. The principal didn’t refuse me though I looked bony and undernourished, for that I felt so appreciative of him. I study and work hard, fulfill my task as a teacher carefully and cautiously. I love those children who study with me; from their passionate eyes, I felt the happiness to live. In those days I met my first, also the only boyfriend, who later became my husband. I had thought I found a home which really belonged to me, but the short happiness ended up with breaking up. I had no regret, since I was not healthy as a woman, and unable to have a baby. Why should I be seen as a burden and add trouble to the others? No! I would rather live alone!
Life is hard, but never did I give up dreaming. I live in my own simple world, and keep pursuing health and happiness. Loneliness is a part of life, but I fear it! I was afraid of it since I was a small child. I was glad that I didn’t need to endure it any more, since I would stay in hospital and be accompanied by some roommates. The doctors found two tumors inside my body, and one of them was removed a week ago. At times, unspeakable pain made me twisted, but I never shouted or screamed, as I knew I would feel more painful if I did. The second tumor will say bye to me when the doctors come back to work after the national holidays. Now I am trying to sell my small house, which I earned after ten years hard work, for surgery fee. Tumors are not frightening, as they could be benign ones. Now the snow-white cloud look so beautiful, which is drifting over my head and give the best greetings to me. I am sure I will be ok this time. God bless me and the other vulnerable creatures.