Laugh at the Blue Moon Crying

About the Book

This book is a compilation of my work from the past 16 years. What this means is, in this book you will literally find writing about everything that happens in a normal person's life from early teenage years well through much of adulthood. I write about true experiences and the emotions all of us feel from time to time, and most are just afraid to ever talk about them or express them in any way, until now. This book is for anyone who's ever cried over a broken heart, lost a loved one, was angry at your family, your friend's might have annoyed you, anyone who has ever gotten in trouble from just being around the wrong people, anyone who's gotten married, had marital problems, had kids, or just about anything else that can happen in life. In short this is a book, the entire world can relate to just about all of it.

About the Author

It's been a hard life for me so far, just as many of you, I'm sure. Through things like challenges, goals, death, and severe illness, truly the battle is brutal, but the rewards of fighting and not giving up are beyond your wildest dreams. I wanted to first write this book to implore all of life's secrets in one book, although a few years ago, my motive changed. I was diagnosed with SLE (Systemic Lupus Erthamae), Multiple Sclerosis, Fibromyalgia, Cervical dislocation and spondalosis, severe pain that cannot be managed as of yet, as well as smaller worries like high blood pressure, and diabetes. My motive change was mainly to leave something for my wife and kids after my time on earth is up. Don't get the wrong, I am by no means giving up, on the contrary fighting harder everyday, but preparing for the inevitable. I hope many people find answers to life's mysteries as they grace the pages of my life's work. I wish all of you the best.

From the Orlando Sentinel

Author's writing battles his illness

A Poinciana man says he doesn't let his problems stop him from making the most of every day.
By Debbie Barr
Special to the Sentinel

September 29, 2004

Philip W. Crawford Jr. is no stranger to the ironies of life.

In the prime of his life at the age of 32, with a family and a newfound career as an author, Crawford has to down 65 pills a day to stay alive.

The Poinciana resident was diagnosed in 1996 with lupus, a serious illness in which the body's immune system attacks its own tissues and organs.

Forced to quit his job as a home-improvement salesman at the age of 28, Crawford decided to turn his lifelong hobby of writing into a full-time career.

His first book, Laugh at the Blue Moon Crying (Trafford and Crawford Enterprises & Publishing, $15.99), became available this year.

The book is a compilation of poetry, short stories and essays spanning 17 years of personal reflection on the yin and yang of emotions that make up the stuff of life, Crawford said.

"It's about pretty much everything in life, but I kind of keep in the lines of feeling," said Crawford, originally from Hagerstown, Md.

At the age of 16, after the devastating loss of his grandfather, followed by the deaths of a few other relatives and friends within a short period of time, Crawford felt so bad that he considered suicide, he said. In fact, the first piece of his writing that was later released to the public was his suicide note.

His high-school teacher, Nandis Chestnut, found a note he had written and talked with the distressed teen, encouraging him to use his pain and anger constructively.

Her message stuck with him and he began writing as a hobby, he said.

More than a decade later, when Crawford was forced to quit his job because of his declining health, he turned to writing as a career.

"It's been such an irony for me. The first time I wrote a suicide note, and then I used writing to improve my life," said Crawford, who dedicated the book to his high school teacher.

The note also appears in the book as a poem titled "Alone."

Crawford said that his first experience with loss was the first time he thought about his own feelings.

Laugh at the Blue Moon Crying is an exploration of those feelings, which are common in nearly everybody, he said.

The 136-page book was whittled down from 12 boxes of writings he collected since that time.

"Some feelings are temporary; some are more permanent. I wanted to keep something that was more permanent. I didn't want to sound like a Hallmark card," he said.

Since 1996, Crawford has endured 13 surgeries related to his illness, including spinal surgery in 2000 that left him in a wheelchair for two years.

He also suffers from multiple sclerosis, high blood pressure, diabetes and continuous pain from old neck and back injuries aggravated by lupus.

These days, he makes five trips to the doctor per week and takes 14 types of medications daily, including high-dose steroids and a chemotherapy drug.

His wife of 13 years, Charlene Crawford, works two jobs to support the family, which includes Shalene, 12 (who did the artwork for the book's cover), John, 9 and Colby, 8.

Crawford said the money from the sales of his recent book will be used to supplement the family's income, but he will also donate $4 per book sale in the purchaser's name to the National Lupus Foundation.

Despite his personal trials, Crawford said he is making the most of his time.

"Doctors tell me I don't have much time, but I have time every day," he said.

The newly published author is ghost-writing two other books and has started work on a second book about the search for faith.

Meanwhile, he said he is relishing the mix of ironies -- good, bad and all else in between -- that life has to offer.

"Life is going to happen to everybody at some time. When it does, instead of trying to run and hide, you've just got to embrace it, because it will define who you are."

For information about the book and donation information for the National Lupus Foundation, contact Crawford at 407-518-9445 or send e-mail to philipcrw@aol.com.