The Amazing Life of George Fred Fiddlington

ALL ABOARD THE AIRPOD George, Butterfield and Freddie all piled into their uncle’s newest airpod. Everyone was very impressed with the lush interior, even George, and he had seen it dozens of times. Swirling blues and greens moved across the curved walls like an ocean. ‘Perfect decoration for seamonster hunting,’ George joked as they all entered. Before even taking off, Butterfield and Freddie were impressed by the many gadgets on board. Freddie especially liked the minocular-binoculars. By directing them out the window Freddie could see a 360 degree view of the surroundings because somehow they managed to dissolve any obstruction (like the walls of the airpod). It was as if he was floating in the sky alone. “Clever device, that one,” commented George as he watched Freddie’s curious expression. “Got super sensors around the airpod Freddie. When you activate the minocular-binoculars the ship seemingly dissolves into the sky.” He nodded; satisfied that another of his inventions was brilliant. “It’s fantastic Uncle George,” cried Freddie. “Look Butterfield check this out.” But Butterfield was absorbed in an animated 3D game which was playing in front of her. The creatures looked so life-like she automatically cringed when they appeared to come too close. “If you drink this you’ll be able to go inside that game Butterfield,” George said delightedly. “Inside it?” Butterfield asked in amazement. She took the sparkling pink liquid George offered and gulped it down. “Here you go,” said George as he handed her a small triangular crystal device. “Jump in.” And so she did. It felt like the ship had grown to 1000 times its size. Creatures roamed around her and with a zip of the crystal triangle they fell down immobilized. “Don’t be too long Butterfield,” George shouted out to her as she disappeared into the wilderness of her game world. “And if you want out just say ‘Befuddled Duck Delidrium’.” Butterfield rolled her eyes. It was typical of her uncle to make up such a ridiculous exit word. She practiced it in her head a few times before traipsing in amongst the jungle palms and tree ferns of the imaginary jungle. “Oh dear,” thought George out loud, “I probably should have told her about the baby dinosaurs that have just hatched in there.” He considered going in to tell her but thought better of it. After all, what harm could a baby dinosaur do really? Freddie ignored his uncle’s mumbling. He was much too busy concentrating on a 3D pod-zoom of music. By plucking a note that was bobbing in the air he could produce perfect replicas of any band playing one of his favorite songs. It was as if he had a front seat at their latest airflash. “Oh look,” George shouted above the noisy music, “there’s Fuz.” A black ball of fluffy fur with huge golden flecked eyes rolled across the floor toward Freddy. Freddy turned down the music by swiping his hand across the faces of the band. “What is it?” he asked amazed and just a little bit disgusted. “It’s Fuz, my airpod’s toy. It starts up when the pod starts up… but you know, I think the airpod activates it even when I’m not here. I think the airpod has grown quite attached to it.” “How can the airpod do that?” asked Freddie doubtfully. “Never underestimate artificial intelligence Freddy. Sometimes I think the airpod feels a bit lonely you know.” George gave his nephew a meaningful look. Freddy had no idea what his uncle’s look was supposed to mean. He felt a bit weird that the airpod had feelings but who was he to judge? “Well, I guess that’s nice for both Fuz and the airpod,” Freddie said trying not to grimace. “Oh,” George added, “and he loves cuddles.” “OK,” Freddy replied hesitantly. He wasn’t sure he wanted to cuddle the fluffy ball with big googly eyes. “I’m sure Butterfield will be glad to know that.” “Excellent,” said George, “excellent.” WHAT BABY DINOSAURS Just as George said that he wondered where on earth Butterfield was, and then he remembered the baby dinosaurs. “Freddie,” George commanded, “get me that console.” He pointed to a purple crystal triangle beside Butterfield’s seat. “This one?” Freddie asked as he passed it to his uncle. George grabbed it quickly and yelled, “Befuddled Duck Delidrium.” The swaying jungle palms that had been rustling behind Freddie while Butterfield played the game, suddenly dissolved. Both George and Freddie were shocked by what they saw next. Butterfield was standing in front of them looking dirty, distraught and desperate. The bottom of her synth-suit was completely tattered as if a million bugs had chewed it up to her knees. Her hair was a mess and she was covered in mud. And she was breathing like she had been running a marathon. “DINOSAURS UNCLE!?” DINOSAURS!?” Butterfield screamed at Freddie and George. Freddie looked startled. Why was it his fault? “Oh,” said George delightedly, “you found my babies?” “BABIES!?” she screamed again. “Have you ever seen a DINOSAUR!? They’re nothing like babies!” “Well why didn’t you use the exit word?” George asked politely. “Let’s see,” Butterfield seethed, “I was staring at a 20 foot DINOSAUR who was so close to me I could feel his saliva dripping on my head and the immobilizer didn’t have any effect on them and strangely enough, I COULDN’T REMEMBER THE STUPID EXIT WORDS!” “Oh dear!” George said horrified. “I guess my babies have grown a little bit since I was in there.” Butterfield plopped down on her seat exhausted. Freddie offered her a bottle of sparkling green juice. She eyed him suspiciously. “No, no,” protested Freddie, “it’s not for the game, normal drink, normal drink.” Butterfield swiped the juice from his hands and guzzled it as if she had been in the desert for a hundred years. “Thanks Freddie,” she said finally as she started to settle down. She did manage to throw another angry glance in her uncle’s direction before calming herself completely. George looked at her apologetically and that helped a little bit. “Perhaps you would like to jump in the ‘Reparatory Restoritory Healing Cleanser’?” George asked Butterfield quietly, as if a loud word might provoke her anger again. “The what?” she asked, now more curious than furious.” “The ‘Reparatory Restoritory Healing Cleanser’,” George repeated. “If you pop into the small cubicle in the corner and press the yellow button all dirty particles will be removed… and any missing fabric,” George glanced at her bare calves with a grimace, “will be restored.” He frowned again at her hair. “Removes hair tangles as well,” he added hopefully. “Hmm,” Butterfield said sounding a little more lighthearted. “Is it safe?” she asked highlighting the last word. “Oh yes, yes, yes. Safe as Calipso Towers,” he promised thinking she was starting to sound more like her mother every day. Butterfield jumped in, pressed the yellow button and within minutes she was clean, dry, fully suited and groomed. “Now that, I like,” she said smiling at her uncle. “Excellent,” George said, “now buckle up Butterfield because we are about to go into galactic-drive.” He smiled a mysterious smile and turned back to the front screen. “Antarctica awaits!”