Love Problematic

One day as a young porcupine was chewing on a stick of wood under a birch tree, at the edge of the meadow he saw a beautiful pink balloon bouncing merrily along the tips of the young grass. He thought, “ she was the most beautiful thing he has ever seen! It was a case of love at first sight. Unfortunately an ugly mutt of a dog was also attracted by the flash of color in the woods. Soon he was running after the balloon snapping at it with his slathery jaws. As they neared the porcupine, he rose up to defend her with a nasty snarl. The irritated dog rushed him, but a flip of his tail sent the dog howling away with a face full of splinters. A shift in the breeze sent the balloon bouncing over to get acquainted. It was a case of love at first sight! She thought, “that with a daring protector like that she would never need to fear anything again! The handsome porcupine flexed his tail to show her how strong he was. She bounced back with a little cry, “You must never do that again” , she said. “Sharp things are very dangerous to me.” With a stab of frustration, he complied, for he was very proud of his bristles and they served him well. Thus began a slightly problematic courtship. He thought such a fragile and beautiful girl, too sweet for his deserving. While she hardly belonged in the wild haunts he inhabited and called his precious home. The lure of the beautiful woman was too much for him and soon he compromised and found himself spending his nights in a woodshed in the suburbs. This led to a number of run-ins with mutts with slathery jaws and soon he was known around the town as a deceptively tough customer. The woodshed was much too splintery a place for the balloon and so without ever seeing himself as a problem, he moved into a cushy basement apartment. The courtship continued until they could not get along without each other any longer. But Alas! Their parents did not approve in the least. Her parents said, “we balloons do not talk to the family of the porcupines. They are very dangerous people.”