Anything You Want

Two Drink Minimum

Two drink minimum
And you must be the one…
Where ever you are
Can you hurry up and get here
Before I develop a drinking problem
In addition to all my others…
That causes me to miss my two drink date minimum…

What does it take
To get through this “event” with you
Or you
Or you…?
I can’t take this anymore.
Where are you man of my dreams
that makes me want to miss that third
and eventual continuous ride to oblivion?

This is the roller coaster ride I dread
As I stand in line, ticket burning a hole in my pocket
Strapped in coaster riding slow and high
To an obvious descent to my death
of knotted stomach, filled with more alcohol to handle
casual conversation of my life for you to judge.

Make pretty, play nice
Get through the ride
End to date
Sloppy, unwanted kisses – pushing you back into the night
Go away, forget me, forget my number…
Where are you my two drink minimum?
Where are you my good knight?

11/12/06

Bait

Cold stares across smoke-filled pub booths
How long do you hold back your truths?
Of your couple-dom
Unsaving grace…

Each knowing, never saying
Hoping and praying
For different outcomes…

She wants all of you
You want what she used to be
Either way the pain
Is still the same.

You’re both
Prisoners locked inside this same game
Where no one wins
And the loss is so much more
Worse than the cost.

And what of Me?
Holding out for the elusive one
Who more than likely
Doesn’t exist.

I do not know
The sun still rises
Against the tides
The moon appears
And so do I
Wait for no one
In my game called Life.

We all play
And the end results are still the same
It’s always how we play the game.

Choose to love
Choose to be fair
It all comes back around again
These lessons unlearned.

For all the happy [sic] couples in my life…

10/4/07

Fishing

Love has a way of leveling me
I find myself in a smaller place than ever before
kind of like a fish bowl
just me and you.

Revelations appear larger than these reflections on glass
I used to believe in me
I used to know who I was
and now a days I find myself questioning
who I am in you…
never mind who I am to me.

I’m drifting like a dead fish
Over fed by food by some careless
2-year old… I’m dying
floating on top of your love.

I don’t know if I can do this whole you and me thing
I’m so afraid I’m going to lose
my reflection in this fish bowl
and I keep trying to swim and catch up with you
but I end up following my own mirage
and get lost in the bowl
Choking on pretty colored pebbles.

I want to believe
I’m good enough for your perfect love
but I end up feeling like a perfect fraud
Fearing you’ll find me out
Scoop me up
Flush me down the drain.

Two different worlds
colliding collectively indifferently
you’re a sunfish swimming seasonally
I’m just a crab sliding sideways on the sand
always looking up wishing and hoping
for what’s best.

1/16/09